Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Absurdity Like an Onion

Department drama update:
Below is an e-mail sent by The Victim (tenured faculty member, crazy) to the head of our department.

I need to correct a serious misunderstanding that you have of the
English language.

It is important to correct the record.

In your email below you state that one of the boy graduate students has been described as a "tosser" and you then state that the term "tosser" is the U.K. equivalent of "wanker".

Thus, you are implying that the word "tosser" is an american word.

You are incorrect.

This is a gross and serious error on your part.

Actually both "tosser" and "wanker" are U.K. expressions.

I do not know what the american equivalent is of "tosser" nor "wanker".

sincerely The Victim


And the original, from our dept. head:

Dear Dr. Administrator:

I received a copy of the outrageous e-mail below sent by your
faculty member, “The Husband” I want to know immediately how you are going to handle this attack as I will be speaking to the student and senior administrators tomorrow (Monday).

In writing to a 2nd year grad student, The Husband calls
him a tosser [U.K. equivalent of "wanker"]